10 Worst Medical Stock Photos Ever

We know they’re not expected to be pretty, amazing or especially creative. But shouldn’t stock photos at least make sense? These medical stock photos, lifted from legitimate stock photo sites and (rather harshly) judged by our panel of experts, definitely missed that point.

(Thanks to Katy, Nora, Greg, Mark, Katherine and Matt for their caption contributions. You can go back to work now.)

10) The biker doc

“Hey, pay attention, man. Internal tattooing is an ART, and you have to RESPECT IT.”

“Hey, pay attention, man. Internal tattooing is an ART, and you have to RESPECT IT.”

 

9) The overzealous masseuse

Just one of Susie Orman’s many skills.

Just one of Susie Orman’s many skills.

 

8) The nurse with munchies

Ask your doctor if prescription strength Krispy Kreme is right for you.

Ask your doctor if prescription strength Krispy Kreme is right for you.

 

7) The suave doctor

voice recorder "That’s when I gazed handsomely into my patient’s sapphire orbs with a look of stone-cold confidence. 'What’s wrong with me?' she pleaded. 'Nothing,' I said with a dashing smile. 'Nothing I can't fix....'"

voice recorder
“That’s when I gazed handsomely into my patient’s sapphire orbs with a look of stone-cold confidence. ‘What’s wrong with me?’ she pleaded. ‘Nothing,’ I said with a dashing smile. ‘Nothing I can’t fix….'”

6) The blankly staring surgeon

Dr. Lephart often found himself lost in visions of a shirtless McDreamy.

Dr. Lephart often found himself lost in visions of a shirtless McDreamy.

 

5) The multitasking practitioner

"It made this sound like 'BEEP! BOOOOOOP!' and then it died. No. Just 'BEEP!' and then a long 'BOOP!' Yes, I tried restarting it."

“It made this sound like ‘BEEP! BOOOOOOP!’ and then it died. No. Just ‘BEEP!’ and then a long ‘BOOP!’ Yes, I tried restarting it.”

 

4) The out-of-place nurse

Of all the blood banks, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine.

Of all the blood banks, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine.

 

3) The focused med students

"...And that’s how babies are made."

“…And that’s how babies are made.”

2) The kinda underage doc

I was a little worried when the directions to the doctor’s office said "The trailer on the side of the freeway with the sign saying Dr. Tiffany, Jr. Varsity Squad/M.D.," But at least she was in my HMO.

I was a little worried when the directions to the doctor’s office said “The trailer on the side of the freeway with the sign saying Dr. Tiffany, Jr. Varsity Squad/M.D.,” But at least she was in my HMO.

1) The world’s ugliest miracle

Jack finally got his third wish. It wasn’t how he pictured it in his head.

Jack finally got his third wish. It wasn’t how he pictured it in his head.

 

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